CRASH BANDICOOT O.D.’S

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I heard a couple huge SMASHES tonite to find this genius rolled past the Boys & Girls Club on our Street (with kids around) passed out with his foot on the gas , smashed over a telephone pole, jumped a 2 ft concrete wall, another pole & an entire fence structure which acted like a net to stop the vehicle. We tried looking in the vehicle & dude looked totally dead but then we saw him grabbing small puffs of air. The interior dash was smoking… The fire department lead took one look at him & said with a sigh “oh, he’s a heroin overdose, GET THE NARCO KIT!”. The paramedics showed up & shot the dead looking guy up with some Narco stuff, he woke right up & they WALKED him AWAKE to the stretcher.

All 20 ft from our office door, glad my truck wasn’t parked there (Or am I?)…glad he didn’t run over any kids or Universal Gym workout folks…
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2 thoughts on “CRASH BANDICOOT O.D.’S

  1. My heroine is just not that strong I guess. I must be getting ripped off. But seriously…..shooting up WHILE DRIVING? Oprah should start a campaign the get actors to sign the “I agree not to shoot up while driving”. #oprah

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